Inventory, Part 2

What is measured on the outside, doesn’t necessarily give measure to the inside. In other words, you can’t judge a book by its cover. Who am I to shitpick my outside, without dissecting the inside?

For starters, I must be harsh.

My eating habits are not great. They’re not bad, but they’re not great. I haven’t exactly been sticking to my super healthy way of life plan. I’m not eating overly large meals or snacking to excess, then again, I’ve also been eating after 7pm.

Let’s dig deeper into the Yucky hole. I haven’t been to the gym in months. Remember Tosca Reno’s fabulous Butt Book workout? Six feet under. My daily cup of green tea has dwindled down to a couple of times a week, and my coffee fast was fast. As I type this, there’s a cup of java on my desk. With cream. And sugar.

I should be shot.

But before I squirt myself to death with Jinny’s Buzz Lightyear water gun, I have to remember the important part of Inventory: being constructive. Always be constructive.

I’ve been dressing better, and that’s no lie. Every fat girl revolves around the very few precious items in her wardrobe that she feels make her look good, or at the very least, hide the bad parts. As every fat girl also knows, the majority of her wardrobe is “someday” clothes, while the clothes on her back get more worn and tired with each passing day.

I have lots of “me when smaller” clothes, and they’re fabulous. But I think I wised up and concentrated more on “me right now” clothes. I wear jeans a lot now, which I haven’t done in years. Blouses and tank tops layered with sweaters, and Puma sneakers. They’re so comfortable, those shoes.

I have started to do more with my hair. I wear it down all the time now. I even wore it up today, but styled differently, with some curls bouncing around here and there. And, ta da, I’ve had it straightened on the odd occasion.

I still stick with my holy cosmetrinity of lids, lashes and lips, but I dress them up a little more on occasion. Sandra’s lesson was not in vain: I wear colours just that much more often now.

I wasn’t going to talk about how fantastic I am, because I don’t do that. I don't think I'm all that fantastic. But then one of my dearest, devoted friends left a comment just the other day that got me *right here*:

I was planning a comment on the fact that you are doing your inventory just on your exterior (which by all means is absolutely gorgeous as it is), and that you are completely not mentioning your inner beauty, your inner persona, YOU! In fact, have you ever talked about it in the past 15 months of Blogging? I'm not sure that you have.

You are a truly beautiful person (Inside & Out) and you have a great group of friends and a fantastic family. You are always smiling and you always make the entire salon laugh when you come in. You are positive, excited and fucking talented. Yet you never write about that.

Yeah... I was going to comment about that, but then I read your last line and I'm hoping that your next post is going to be an "internal inventory"... and don't worry... my comments are not copyrighted so you can just cut and paste.

-- Lance

Wonderful friends are wonderful to have, because they see in us the things we often can’t.

Thanks, pookie.

So all in all, I’m not so bad. But if I want my outsides to start matching my insides, there’s plenty left to do.

First things first: more tea, less coffee. And start exercising again, stupid.