Awhile ago I purchased Deborah Low’s book, The Quest for Peace, Love and a 24" Waist, and like most of the “better me” books I’ve bought over the years, it ended up on a gigantic stack collecting dust.
I pulled it back out a few days ago, and a simple leaf through reminded me why I’d purchased it in the first place. Here are the first few paragraphs of Chapter 2:
I was once a most favored, loyal, and tormented member of The Diet Club, and with only a hint of apology, I believe that if you are reading this book, then you, too, may be a silent member.
Gee, thanks. I might be more offended if you weren’t so dead on.
Welcome to the club - and guess what? No initiation fees!
Why can’t gyms or health clubs have no initiation fees? Credit cards? Cell phone packages? Anyway, I digress.
Most new members become part of the club for free by passively adopting the messages of our diet-focused-body-conscious-media-crazed society.
I’d say. One glimpse of a bikini model’s behind makes me want to rip my hair out. And, even though she’s never done me any personal harm, it makes me want to hate her forever. How’d she get so lucky? Why is it so easy for her? How nuts am I to even think having a great body is lucky, when I know absolutely nothing about this person to begin with, or what they might have done to get that body?
The power these messages have on how we think our bodies should look, are insidious and complex. We sign the contract without consciously examining the mentality behind this ingrained belief.
A concise over-simplification of the message would read something like this: First, you must have the body. Slim. Lean. Strong. Sexy. Then you are permitted to reap society’s rewards – respect, a successful career, a loving man who desires you, and personal validation as a strong-willed, competent, bathing-suit-wearing, free-spirited female!
Sigh. Sometimes, being a girl really stinks. Stinks with that rotten egg smell.
But you can get the jist of what this book is all about: no vigorous exercise or meal plans, but the issues we have on being fat, and how that prevents us from really being happy in the now.
It’s an interesting theory, getting to the root of the problem. It’s more interesting that something in this slim book could make me think a different way.
Hare Hare Krishna. Break out the patchouli.
But again, in all seriousness, if beating the dead horse the past almost 20 years of my life has gotten me nowhere, then maybe a quick rewire of my brain will.
Ha! Quick, my arse. But it’s worth a try.
8 comments:
Don't you EVER do that!! By 'that', I mean rip your hair out. That would make me most upset.
Also, we can't assume that it is 'easy' for those models, as you have pointed out in the recent past. Your family and friends didn't know what was going on for you, and that little girl in the playground may have thought it was 'easy' for you.
But, the models are probably big bitches anyway... with the clap... and stupid laughs... and a huge second toe.
-L
PS: Wow! Someone really likes their Bible, huh?
I need some rewiring too, unfortunately the other way. I tend not to tell people this because it is crazy but I tend to see myself as skinnier than I am. It has made me not try to lose weight when I probably should have. Even though i have had moments of starving and other extreme things they were mostly because I thought I should or that others were doing it. I'm trying to see myself more "correctly" so that I can get myself healthier.
This book sounds fascinating. I think I want to read it. :)
Oh god I have a ton of books like this. All collecting dust. I should maybe dig them out again.
There's a reason why most self-help books are sitting in a dusty pile on one's floor. They're terrible. The language is stuffy and blase and they can't hold most readers' attention.
I don't know this woman or what her story is, but she sounds like an absolute bore. One book I read and didn't entirely hate was by Michele Weston. But I don't think it was a book of how to become skinny in a healthy way but more of how to accept who you are, as you are, before making any changes. Maybe that's why I didn't hate it. :)
Chicklet, it looks like you got spammed up there.
Now, about those models .... we probably have NO idea what they've been through to get where they are. Weren't we just talking about our "skinny" year in the car just yesterday - and the amount (lack of) food that we actually ate in comparison to the amount that we worked out. That was absolutely nuts! As for changing our frame of mind ... it definitely needs to start with one person - good luck! I've come to the conclusion that I NEVER want to be near a scale or have one in my house. (Except, Corey has one - though hasn't used it in a very long time. Maybe I can get rid of it - he'd probably never notice.)
I'd say - forget about everyone else - all the digital enhancement and all that crap - I'd still never want to be a skinny rake as many models are. Even if they can fit into D&G or Prada or Versace with ease. I'll pass. And so will you.
Interesting entries about the bible. Though, I'm not quite understanding what the scripture has to do with your writings. (I may be having a blonde moment - no offense to any blondes - but I highly doubt it.)
Professor Howdy... okay. I do have to say that I found I found your name mighty interesting... didn't the devil disguise himself as Captain Howdy to young Regan in The Exorcist?
Lance... I know.
Natalie, seeing one's self as too thin can't be that bad of a thing. Unless you're in serious health or heart trouble, don't try to change too much.
Mrs. L, it's a pretty good read, what I like about it is that through the tests and questions etc., you provide a lot of the picture, and your own reading.
Airam, if you got them in the first place, they're worth the read! And maybe your pulling your books out wil inspire me to pull out the rest of mine!
Saucy, it's actually a good book. If you were ever to see my room you'd notice I have dozens of books all over the floor in piles, the vast majority not self-help books. That's what you get for being a reader.
Oli... I know. xoxo
Great writing... looks like you are more than on the right track to getting where you want to go. Hey...what's wrong with patchouli?
And by the way, we all need a quick rewire of the brain now and again to shake things up. We can get far to caught up in the ridiculousness of life.
Great blog... thanks so much for telling me about you.
Deborah Low
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