Thursday, March 26, 2009

(I know, I know, I'm a shit. BUT on the bright side I've written about 30 pages these past few weeks - really! - and have set up a schedule to religiously post twice a week. Stay tuned...)

Well, I suppose it’s because of a lot of other things I don’t do.

I don’t work out much. I have my fits and spurts like, become a gym fanatic to look good in this dress, or, summer is coming it’s sit-ups time! But I’ve never really made exercise a routine or daily fixture of my life. This is a shame in more ways than one, made bigger by the fact that I do in fact have a dog and should, at the very least, be running around with him every single day.

I snack. Boo. I snack later on in the evening, especially. Bigger boo. And while I don’t snack “bad”, at least for the most part, snacking later is not a good thing in general. Boos all around.

I may not thrive on unhealthy foods but I am a gourmet fanatic, and the lipids count on too many of those items is high, baby high. Rich cheeses, delectable pasta, sumptuous, fruity rich oils. I do try and eat these in moderation but every now and again a puttanesca will look at me longingly, and I’ll oblige by giving it a home. In my stomach.

Salt. Heavens to Betsy, I love salt. I think the sweet tooth I didn’t get is due to the oh-so-savoury taste buds rock ‘n rolling away in my mouth, bossing the sugar wants away. I have four kinds of sugar in my cupboard to fulfill every coffee and baking need; I have 14 different kinds of salt. Among them are kosher and sea salt for everyday, Fleur de Sel and Sel Gris for finishing, black salt for earthiness and truffle salt for everything from hard boiled eggs to popcorn seasoning. Air popped.

I love vegetables but don’t eat them as often as I’d like, especially in the winter months. I never pre-plan my meals, either. I do my best but then sometimes I just get so hungry or tired or both, and with few options before me I usually go for the toasted bagel that’s quick, easy and packed with carbs.

So while it could be said that I try hard, I really don’t try hard enough. But I’m not going to let that get me down.

In spirit of Love and Me, or, Loving Me, I think I’ll stop slapping myself on the wrist all the time. I’m human. I’m doing good but not my best; I’m not going to resolve to try harder because honestly, that mostly accomplishes nothing. I just know I can do better. And the main difference between this year and all the years behind me is, I want to do better.

I’ve been saying I have to I have to I HAVE TO for years now and quite frankly, it’s gotten me nowhere. I’ve been saying I can’t I can’t I CAN’T for even longer, and that’s taken me just as far.

I remember saying I HAD to study hard for this or that exam in university, then ending up going out with friends instead. I also remember my father telling me time and again in high school that I COULD NOT go out with boys, but you know what? I found a way around that. The forbidden fruit is always the sweetest.

What I also know and remember is that when I wanted something that was totally achievable, I would get it. I wanted to learn how to rollerblade, and no matter how many times my ass hit the pavement, I made it happen. I wanted to get into journalism school, I wanted that internship in Europe; I worked my butt off for both, and did it.

It will happen because it will; it will happen because I want it to. It’s when I want something that badly that it stops becoming what it started as: want. It becomes a need, the air that I breathe. That’s when the magic happens.

44 comments:

Mrs. Loquacious said...

I hear ya. Until you reach that pivotal "rock bottom" moment, it's hard to keep up the commitment to something you're not entirely sold on. I may be fat, and fatter than I've ever been, but I'm also healthy and I kind of accept my chunk (except when I'm trying to buy clothes), so I'm not sold on hitting the gym 6 days a week and eating veggies. But soon I think I'll be hitting rock bottom...it's time to start, my friend. You and I. :)

Anonymous said...

Hope everthing's ok. it's been awhile since you've updated...

The Tormented Girl said...

I miss your writings :)

Anonymous said...

I miss you're writing too!

5225 said...

Necessity is the mother of invention..........................

touch said...

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童紫勳 said...

得意人,聽腳步聲就知道。 ....................................................

李惠玲 said...

Variety is the very spice of life.......................................................

RafaelLetso21555 said...

TAHNKS FOR YOUR SHARING~~~VERY NICE ........................................

思穎思穎 said...

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RexTemples20144 said...

文章很棒~感謝!!..................................................

黎美朝宜書 said...

來拜訪你囉~期待你的下次文章~加油^^.........................

Br1207yantScipio1 said...

Cast not the first stone. .............................................

韋于倫成 said...

能猜得出女人真實年齡的男人也許耳聰目明,但肯定毫無大腦。哈哈! ..................................................

Airam said...

WHere'd you go???

旺劭旺劭 said...

一個人的價值,應該看他貢獻了什麼,而不是他取得了什麼..................................................

佩GailBohanan1蓉 said...

Learn wisdom by the follies of others. ............................................................

chrry said...

財富並非永遠的朋友,但朋友卻是永遠的財富。 ............................................................

RoseH_Huls21365 said...

恨一個人,比原諒一個人,更傷力氣。..................................................................

胤綸胤綸 said...

與人相處不妨多用眼睛說話,多用嘴巴思考,....................................................................

江婷 said...

喜歡你的部落格,留言請您繼續加油.................................................................

雅莊王edgd春2蕙婷余惠其 said...

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賢林 said...

睇完之後覺得有d頓悟..感謝分享...................................................................

宜FH定博林P'韓T彥 said...

單純喜歡你的部落格 留個言跟您問聲好~~............................................................

吳婷婷 said...

Some people cannot see the wood for the trees.............................................................

佳皓佳皓 said...

If you can not be kind, at least have the decency to be vague.............................................................

潘凱花潘凱花 said...

thanks god for the chance to enjoy so many good artical.............................................................

鄭雅琦鄭雅琦 said...

人生有如洶湧的波濤,如果沒有岩石的阻擋,怎能激起美麗的浪花?............................................................

ErnestoW_Honaker101婉菁8 said...

Failure is the mother of success...................................................

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感謝分享唷^^~~.........................................

劉智陳建霞堯 said...

Practice what you preach.............................................................

黃怡張華樺張華樺妹 said...

「仁慈」二個字,就能讓冬天三個月都溫暖。..................................................

建邱勳 said...

rain before seven; fine before eleven.............................................................

基韬 said...

友誼能增進快樂,減少痛苦......................................................................

劉王育正劉王育正 said...

人若賺得全世界,賠上自己的靈魂,有什麼益處?......................................................

倪平 said...

先將一個人的生活過好,才有能力過好兩個人的生活................................................

承王蓁 said...

人因夢想而偉大,要堅持自己的理想哦!............................................................

怡靜怡靜怡靜怡雯 said...

Necessity is the mother of invention..................................................................

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你怎麼能經過一片海,而忘記它的藍?......................................................................

張王雅竹欣虹 said...

來塊巧克力吧~~心情會好哦~~...............................................................

孟湖聿軒 said...

今夜星光多美好~祝你快樂~~~~............................................................

瑰潼 said...

在莫非定律中有項笨蛋定律:「一個組織中的笨蛋,恆大於等於三分之二。」............................................................

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