Calorie Chronicles: The Eating Disorder(s)

I was born and raised in the Western Hemisphere, a blessing and curse in its own right. I live in a country with a stable economy and equal opportunity for all, where everyone has the right to realize their dreams if they are willing to work hard enough.

I also live in a country with the most brainwashed and distorted perceptions of the human condition. Ours is a poisoned society, because all too often we give merit for good looks, instead of a person's true inner worth. We have America’s Next Top Model, The Swann and Extreme Makeover, shows where the most beautiful are rewarded, or where happiness is given to the miserable by reinventing their physical appearance. They were miserable to begin with, because they thought they were ugly.

Why don’t we have shows called Everyday Heroes, Shaping Young Minds, Inspirations, or The Next Nobel Peace Prize Winner? Low ratings, I suppose. But I hear the next installment of The Bachelor will be airing soon.

The expectations on women are particularly cruel, and we see them everyday. Svelte, gorgeous actresses, stunning models, magazine covers, centerfolds; they’re everywhere we look, everywhere we go, from billboards to subway ads to television and drugstore shelves. It’s unavoidable, all of it.

Ask a group of little girls who they would rather be like, Madeleine Albright or Lizzy McGuire. How many of them would actually know who Madeleine Albright is?

At one time or another we have all fallen into the Perfection Trap and for most of us, the standards of 36-24-36 are impossible to reach. Thousands, millions, billions of collective dollars are spent every year in that Quest for Beautiful, but how many actually reach it?

And then for others the situation becomes something else altogether; something a lot more dangerous.

I have never known a woman or girl with an eating disorder. At the same time, I have never met a woman or girl who didn’t have an eating disorder. I say that because I don’t know if dabbling with eating disorders really means that you have one; if the girl who’s putting her finger down her throat to lose a few pounds is truly on the same level as the 80lb girl at the clinic.

We all know what they are, the queens of the disorders crop being Anorexia Nervosa and Bulimia.

Anorexia seems the more fatal of the two, a psychiatric condition dealing with the obsessive fear of gaining weight. These poor souls starve, vomit and exercise their way to skinny, often becoming so fearfully thin that they barely weigh enough to survive. We have all seen pictures; often, a photo of a severe anorexic can be matched to the starving child living in famine, or the concentration camp victims of the second world war.

Many, many people, mostly women, have had Anorexia nervosa. Many have died.

Bulimia is the other one, where binge eating is followed by brutal purging; vomiting, laxative abuse, diuretics, fasting, and extreme physical activity. Television has given us the popular image of the bulimic as the gorgeous supermodel inhaling a four-tier wedding cake by herself, followed by a trip to the bathroom for a cleansing puke. No calories, no damage.

But there’s plenty of damage, especially over time. The digestive system pays a heavy price from all that forced vomiting, and severe potassium loss can lead to heart failure, heart attack and stroke. There is also the toll on physical appearance: limp hair, sallow skin, ruined teeth.

Sometimes I think it's pretty ironic that looks start to flounder, considering that a big reason a lot of people start doing this in the first place, is to look better. At least, that is what it seems.

Anorexia, bulimia, bulimia, anorexia. We are not strangers to each other, they and I. Though our time together was brief, there was a summer where I played with both.